Sunday, 2 September 2012

How to stop feeling down...

This is a question that is asked often.
We say things such as,
'but I just can't help it, I'm sad, depressed, lonely, upset,' etc, etc....

And yes, we have all felt that at times, me included!
And I agree fully, it is very hard to stop it, and the only way to overcome that hardship is to make the decision unequivocally, congruently and with conviction that...
that is in fact what you want.

Of course that's what I want!
I hear you yell. I yelled the loudest!
I ask you now, tentively (-:
(as I know how I responded to this question,

I'm sorry, I don't mean to cause consternation and before you click me off with an indignant thump of your fingers, just think about it a little, okay?

I did and I realized something really bizarre.

A lot of the time (not always) I actually didn't really want to let go of my hurt and pain.
In fact I WANTED to hold on to it!
I WANTED and CHOSE to curl up with it under my duvet and snuggle it into my belly where I nurtured it and watched it grow with all the tears I soaked it with.
I grew this pain and suffering into a giant ball inside of me and relished in the suffering I was inflicting on myself.

It felt 'normal', like what was expected of me. It's what you do, right??
When something sad or bad or simply just life happens, we are supposed to feel miserable, arent we?It's the procedure, no?

I was simply carrying out what was expected of me, or at least what I thought was expected.
I played the part of Bridget Jones to perfection, stuffing myself with barrels of Icecream and torturing the neighbours with wailing songs of hardship and lost love.
My martyrdom and expertise at being a victim was deservant of a Oscar.

Any of this sound familiar???

Experience has shown that we often tend to assimilate what we are programmed subliminally or otherwise. Media wants us to be miserable and buy into all the 'comfort' products they offer.
Promising us to 'feel better' if we just buy this record, eat this food, go on this holiday, etc...
History teaches us this is how we are 'supposed' to react. Tales of sadness and woe fill our childhood & schoolbooks. Othello looking for revenge, Romeo dying for his beloved Juliette, Van Gogh never being content with his work.
Everything tells us we should want more & more, we should not be happy just as things are.

So, how about if we were? How would it feel?

Think of nothing for a moment. Go on, try it....

Can you?? Or is your mind full of cluttering thoughts?

I realized that it was a choice we make. Of course there are certain times in our life that we may need to mourn a little but we do know the difference. Dont we?
Go on be honest with yourself.

Once I decided to let go of the bitter sweet feeling of sadness that I clung on to so desperately,I started to feel free. I realized that it was simply a choice I could make.

I could keep it and continue to nurture the seeds of misery or choose to let it go and start living my life.
I chose to throw off the duvet and dump the Icecream.

I promise you, it is simply a choice.
You too can do it.
You just have to choose to want to...

If you would like some support with this or simply an understanding ear
call me at 086-3845299
or email

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